I don't know what motivation is. I don't know how to harness it. I wish I did.
I have spent probably the better part of the last ten years trying to work out how to push through the hard times and not to burn out during the easy times and if anything at the last month has shown anything at all, it is that I still don't know what the hell I'm doing. I've learned some tricks that work sometimes, but it doesn't just work, which is irritating. Open up a computer, run a program that you want to use, and the program works every time. I don't have a Motivation.exe file that I can click on.
I am writing this on my new dictation set up, sitting on my balcony outside, recording. I am trying not to look at my phone, although I am occasionally glancing to make sure it is still working. I am trying to get in my mind how much of a break I can leave in between words, and whether or not I can speak naturally and it will still record.
Because not paying attention to the dictation, I expect that some of the words might not be quite right, and it will never be 100% correct. I also find it hard to do the punctuation when I'm dictating if I'm not looking at the words being written. But I'm pretending right now that I'm at work using the Bluetooth microphone, to learn how effective the setup is. I am interested to see how much the microphone picks up, what it gets wrong, and how much I can fix with Grammarly after.
This current Bluetooth set up is another bite at the motivation apple that I have been chewing at for some time. I'm hoping that it makes life easier, but I am fully aware that the amount of training that I need to do on myself to dictate effectively is a long-term project. Sometimes you have to go through the pain. It is just like when I learned to type. I started out using the old two-finger method and moved on to touch typing when I needed to increase my speed and accuracy. Increased speed and accuracy helps to produce more words per hour, and that's exactly what this is all about. How many words can I produce per hour? Can I be even faster and more productive than before?
This is basically a complete rethinking of what I was doing before. Before I was stuck to the computer, I could only work while I was at home. I've experimented with expanding working in other places by putting the Word app on my phone. But of course, that means that I can type in my break at work, and the Samsung keyboard is slow.
Over the last couple of months, I've really slowed down doing everything. I don't know whether this is going to work, but what I do know is what I was doing before wasn't working.
So this week is about learning new things, just like every other week. I am learning the limitations of my current set up, learning whether or not this system will work and deliver on the investment that I put into it. If not, then I will look for another way.
If I can't find another way to increase my productivity, I might have to make the leap and reduce my hours at work. I will eventually have to do that, but I want to have firmer ground under me before I jump for a ledge that could be further away than I think it is. My current plan is to reduce my hours in 2021. I wanted to be building towards that goal for the rest of this year, but it is already September, and I spent the last two months doing nothing.
I need to get motivated. Whatever that means.